The Power of Advertising

While he was eating dinner, Po just asked me, "Mommy, are we using all of our taste bugs?"

I busted out laughing. I usually try to keep a straight face. I had to explain, "Po, I'm not laughing at you, I'm just laughing because you're remarkable. How do you know about taste buds?"

"Well, from the Fruity Petals and Cocoa Petals commercial."

Of course. "Tell me more about that," I requested.

"There's the Fruity Petals and the Cocoa Petals. I like the Fruity Petals. And then this BIG tongue comes out with the taste bugs, and I wonder if we're using all of them."

"I just don't know, Po. I just don't know," said, still laughing. "Eat your dinner, please."

Defending the Cacti

While we were driving around today, Po asked "why do cacti have spikes?" Yes, he used the correct plural form of "cactus."

Now that's one of those questions like "why is the sky blue?" or "who is the fourth president of the United States?" that you'd think you'd know the answer to right away, and then quickly realize that you're not one hundred percent sure if you're making it up or if you're pulling it from an accurate file from long ago.

I answered "I think probably because most likely they need them because it seems like they need them for protection." Yeah. That's it.

"Well, maybe we should look it up when we get home," Po suggested.

"Great idea. Let's do that." Here we go. Outsmarted by Po, once again. There's no satisfying him with a half-assed answer. I thought for a few moments, and then said "you know, Po, now that I'm thinking about it, I bet they really do have spikes to defend themselves."

He elaborated for me. "Oh, yeah. Like from predators who want to eat them. Like the piranha."

"I'm not sure the piranha is a threat to the cactus."

"Well, piranhas can be really snappy things that are really snappy when you try to save the life of something that they are trying to eat. They'll eat anything, you know. And they don't want to not eat the thing that you're trying to save. They're really snappy."

"Wow. You know a lot about piranhas, Po."

"Yep. So cacti have spikes to protect them from predators, like the piranha," he concluded.

When we got home, I looked it up. Wikipedia says: "In most species of cacti the leaves have evolved into spines which not only defend the cactus against herbivores but also provide shade that lowers the plants water loss through transpiration."

Po's response? "Oh, yeah! Herbivores! Herbivores are predators to cacti."

Folks, that concludes today's lesson.

The Longest Red Light

We were sitting for a while at a red light earlier today. Once the light turned green and we were off again, Po said "Well, that's the longest red light I've ever attended."

Daddy Drama

Po often comes into our bedroom in the wee hours of the morning for a little snuggle before starting the day. This morning he was greeted by Daddy saying "SHIT" and springing out of bed in a mad dash, turning the bathroom light on and off, banging around, and throwing clothes everywhere.

Po and I giggled a little bit, and Po said "Sheesh, Daddy. You don't have to be all dramatic just because you're late for work."

A Losing Battle

Who doesn't have food issues? I try to feed my kids healthy, minimally-processed, mostly organic-ish stuff, but I'm not all OCD about it. I try not to fight with them about how much they eat. I recently read "you decide what your child eats. They decide how much." Makes sense, and it makes me feel better. My kids often decide that nothing is the right amount, but I am still trying to remind myself that I decide and I'm in control every day, no matter how out of control I feel.

Lately I've been trying to cut back on the kids' snacks. I figure if they are actually super hungry for a meal, they'll eat. I can deal with the nagging, right?

This afternoon, Po and Cam each had a snack, and then Po asks for another snack.

"No, Po. You just had a snack, and I'm going to make you dinner in an hour or so."

"But MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOmy. I'm stAAAAAAAAAAAAAArving."

"Great. Then you'll eat your dinner when I–"

"You're not listening to me," Po interrupted.

"I'll be happy to listen to you when you're not sassing me. Until then, I refuse to listen to you. Let me know when you're ready."

There was a millisecond pause, and then Po came back with an argument. "I'm just saying that if you don't let me have a snack, then I still won't eat my dinner."

"Well, that's your choice, Po."

"No, it's not. If you let me have a snack, I'll still eat my dinner."

"Well, that's interesting, but you're not having a snack right now."

I believe I got a growl back. So my kid is going to be REEeEEEEeEEEEEEEally STAAAAAAAAAAAAAArving tonight since he is not going to eat a snack or dinner.

Maybe we should all just go to bed.

A Break in the Routine

Bath. Stories. Song. Kisses. Bed.

That's the routine.

Though I do sing to my kids quite frequently, the nighttime "song" is always played off my iPhone, and the kids get to pick if they want "rock 'n' roll" or "something mellow." They almost always pick the former, and then the get to bounce around and show off their moves right before laying their precious heads down. The last burst of energy for the day.

I particularly like it when they pick "something mellow," because it doesn't happen very often (usually only when they are trying to con me into a second song). Tonight Porter said "let's hear a mellow song, 'Find Yourself' (from 'Cars')." It was our road trip song from last year, and he's always been sentimental about it, the sensitive child that he is. I was happy to oblige.

"Okay, then," I said, "crawl into bed and I'll tuck you in and we can listen."

Porter quietly protested, "but I want to do Tai-chi."

Sometimes I just stare at my child with my jaw open for longer than is appropriate. "Alright, then. Let's see it."

Not only did the child do the best inexperienced-but-feeling-it Tai-chi ever (in my opinion), but he influenced his sister to do the same. So we did Tai-chi before bed tonight and reflected on our lives as we found ourselves once again.

All thanks to Po.

Once again.

The Bottom Line

I try my best to be a calm mother. I take deep breaths, and I count. I ignore my children if it's in the best interest of everyone involved so child services doesn't get called. And if things are going haywire in the car, I turn my music up and tell myself that it's better for the kids to beat the shit out of each other than for me to overturn our car trying to avert the inevitable.

We had quite a few errands to run with quite a bit of driving today, and Campbell was in a horrible mood. She cried because she was thirsty, then she cried because she threw her water bottle out of reach. Didn't want shoes, then wanted them back on. Wanted Mimi (special blankie), then tossed her (it) on the floor...it just went on and on. And on. And on. I tried the music and the ignoring, but she just screamed louder since she's so sensitive to loud noises (except herself).

After what seemed like three months of enclosed car torture, Porter finally turned to Campbell and said "You know what your problem is? You cry too much!"

She was silent for the rest of the ride.